Expiredate reached, please remove.

This is what school does to you.




Yes, it does. But anyway, I happened upon a video clip with a guy who got to hang out with Michael Hussar, and from there on to his website. And damn! For the first in a long time I felt  the itch to paint! Michael Hussar is awesome and super creepy and just wonderful. 
Didn't turn out to be a painting, but a drawing, colored pencils on watercolor paper and a bit of gouache. And a few tweaks in photoshop, since it actually isn't finished yet.

But I share anyway!

Birdladies never fail you.

Did indeed get some work done finally. I've had a horrible artblock, and my hands have been fucked, but right now I feel pretty good. Wanting to have something to show my teacher tomorrow, I made these. Birdladies almost never fail, unless I fuck up the colors. And I didn't this time, though my scanner ate some of them ;;
So as usual the originals are so much nicer.

I'm actually amazed they turned out so happy, because when I started yesterday, I was pretty pissed. My neighbours on the side had a party, and the scumbag underneath me was smoking so much I was about to die. So, opening the windows to blow the stink out, I was wearing two sweaters, woolly socks, a scarf and a hat, and a blanket over my legs not to freeze to death. When I move, I'm gonna put something disgusting in Mr. Scumbag's mailbox.

So, despite that, these are happy.
Happy happy!

Come Undone

Right now I'm feeling... perhaps not the best. I'm somewhere between disappointed, pissed and lonely. Add a bit of boredom and frustration. And sadness. I'm just not sure what I want, where I'm going or what the hell I am doing right now.

I feel isolated.

Things just piss me off, but I know it's only 3 months before I leave. Still doesn't make it better.

Then I have to figure out where the heck I'm going after that. And I don't know.

And all I feel is sad. And lonely. And isolated.

Not to mention I'm repeating myself. A lot.

First post to this thing.

Project blog for school, in which I will keep my sketches and drawings, thoughts and feelings.


Last night when I went home from a movie there was this creepy man on the bus who kept staring at me. Normally it wouldn't bother me all that much, but when it's nearing 9pm and you're plunged into total darkness in a tiny city like this, IT IS CREEPY. If you were to get followed and ambushed by someone, there is likely no one around to hear you or help you. You're on your own.
Silly thing was that I didn't wear my Dc Martens. Bright yellow boots sort of make you feel more secure, because people don't pick a fight when you wear them. Hell, they're even scared of sitting next to you on the bus. Converse suck in this aspect. Not a very frightening shoe. Even if they are red.

So, I got off two stops early, where a family with kids got off, just in case, and walked the last bit home. It did feel more secure, but it was the most paranoid I've ever been on a bus. Feeling your heart beat hard enough to make it feel like the whole seat was pulsating was a new experience for me.

Afterward I felt a bit silly, because in the security of my own home I could think back on the whole thing. The man had red, bloodshot eyes. Alcoholic or a junkie of some sort most likely, and people like that usually don't follow you home and try to rape you on the way. They're probably more keen on stealing your wallet and your red shoes, and perhaps your jacket if it fits. Still, you should trust your gut reaction, because the day you don't, you lie in a pile in some bushes, bloody and violated.


Bumming around on my couch this afternoon I had this idea, sketched it down before I forgot, and then made a speed painting of it.